What is healing with purpose? And what would it look like to heal a broken heart while using it for a mighty purpose?

In the wake of the Saugus shooting that took place on the morning of November 14th, 2019, there are thousands of heavy hearts that are wondering why? Or how can someone do this horrible and heinous act of violence to innocent people in our community?

The answer to that question is a natural and very important part of the grieving process. It’s the starting point that millions of people seek, who’ve initially been affected by tragedies such as ours, in order to heal themselves.

It might seem like a challenging journey, but challenging implies that it’s possible, and you have to believe that you are capable of discovering for yourself how to come to terms with what happened, and the completion of this cruel event that we’ve all been so profoundly affected by.

Every person eventually finds their own version of why or how this could have happened, that satisfies them enough in order to find the strength and courage to pick up their broken heart, heal it, and get on with living their purpose-driven life.

There is no exact timeframe for this process, everyone’s healing expedition is different. This hero’s journey is a custom design for each of us, so it’s best to not try and compare one’s progress to another.

So, what if… The “why” was as simple as – people who hurt, hurt other people.

Could it be possible that there are people that live in our community, walking amongst us that appear to be lost, broken, hurt individuals who have given up all hope that they matter, believing that they’re not important, that they are insignificant, not accepted in this world; not loved by anyone?

Could it be that some of them are suicidal and when at their breaking point decide to take their own lives, and that some are so angry that they make the unthinkable and unimaginable decision to cause pain and suffering to as many people as they can?

If you have answered yes to any of these questions, you have already begun the process of healing.

Make no mistake about it, this possibility is by no means a justification for anyone to hurt other people, ever; for any reason.

Healing with a purpose, is to heal with the intention to create the desired result.

What would it look like if while you were healing, you helped others heal too?

What would it look like if you played a part in the healing of someone who was headed towards a dark and lonely place, helping change the course of another tragic event like the one that changed your life forever?

If and when you are ready, I want to invite you to heal with a specific purpose.

I want to invite you to make a conscious committed effort to heal yourself and those around you.

If enough of us say yes to this kind of commitment, together we will heal our community. Together we can transform the planet, so that not one more person would have to be injured, be killed in a senseless act of violence, or families and communities suffer from the trauma and pain inflicted by anyone. Together we all can stop mass shootings.

They say the greatest way to counterbalance fear, hatred, and violence is to love.

Can you love, be kind and heal people?

Of course you can.

How can we heal people?

With our eyes.

Our eyes are powerful and healing.

The most common greeting in villages of the Zulu tribes in Africa is “Sawubona.” It means “I see you”, you are important to me, I value you, and you matter. It’s a beautiful way to make other people visible and you bring them into existence. It also means, I value you, and I accept you with all your virtues, nuances, flaws, and differences.

The most common response to this beautiful conscious and intentional greeting is Ngikhona. It means “I am here”, I am here to be seen, or yes, I see you too.

Connecting with your eyes is a universal language of the soul.

So, here’s the challenge “I challenge you to make a new commitment to yourself and to those of our community (our tribe) to start acknowledging each other with your eyes.”

So that one by one, we validate that we matter to one other, that we are important to each other in this global phenomenon of oneness; creating a mutual connection and a bond of kindness, so that no one ever feels so disconnected, and so hopeless to the point that they feel the need to cause pain or suffering to others.

I invite you to participate in this ongoing movement to help heal our community; here are ways to participate.

  1. Make eye contact
  2. Make eye contact and a verbal “I see you”
  3. Make eye contact and a smile
  4. A hug (agreed by mutual parties)

If you want to heal with a purpose and join the ‘i see you challenge,’ we welcome you and applaud your commitment to help heal together.




Alex Urbina

Life Coach & Teen and Parenting Expert

Author of The Inspirational Parent

Join Alex Urbina Wednesday, November 20th for a powerful night of Community Healing and Grief Support. The free event starts at 6:30pm at the (closed) Bouquet Canyon Elementary Building at 28110 Wellston Dr. Santa Clarita, Ca 91350, everyone is welcome